Ah, Doctors!

What do you get when a doctor and an archaeologist have a baby? A little digi-nurse!

  • What do you call a doctor who’s great with computers? A byteful physician!
  • Why did the doctor bring a ladder to work? Because they heard there was a high pressure situation in the emergency room!
  • What do you call a fake doctor? An impasta-tor!
  • Did you hear about the doctor who was always running late for appointments? He finally realized he needed to fix his watch because patients were getting sick of waiting.
  • What do you call a doctor who loves apples? A core-diologist!
  • Why did the doctor go broke? He kept making bad incisions!
  • Why did the doctor refuse to treat the computer? He said it had too many bugs!
  • Why did the pharmacist break up with the chemist? Because they had too many reactions!
  • Why did the nurse bring a ladder to work every day? Because she was told there were plenty of career opportunities in healthcare!
    • How does a surgeon know when to stop operating on a patient? When they find the remote control!
  • How does a doctor stop a crime wave? With a splint!
  • Did you hear about the doctor who retired from his practice to become a farmer? He’s now growing peas instead of treating them
  • How does a doctor organize an office party? With a prescription for fun!
  • What did the doctor say when they saw a broken heart? “Looks like you need some emotional stitches!”
  • What do you call a doctor who runs out of patients? A very angry doctor!
  • The doctor’s family tree is full of medical practitioners and has no room for actual family!
  • With the rise in telemedicine, a patient calls his doctor for an online consultation. The doctor responds, “I can’t examine you through the screen! You’ll need to call in sick and come into the office.”
  • In response to news of a new health app gaining popularity among patients, a doctor quips, “Looks like my future job title will be ’tech support for your wellness journey’.” The colleague adds with a smile, “Hopefully not as challenging as fixing their printer!”
  • A pharmacist tells a nurse, “I’m not sure if I should call you ‘medicine sister’ or ‘drug buddy.’” The nurse chuckles and responds, “Maybe we can just be ‘pill pals’?”